


Deceive Me No More

by ReasonToSmile



Category: Lovely Little Losers, Nothing Much to Do
Genre: Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-25 05:04:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4947763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReasonToSmile/pseuds/ReasonToSmile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the chicken challenge, Peter decides to finally have a talk with Balthazar</p>
            </blockquote>





	Deceive Me No More

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic! I wasn't planning on ever writing one, but after CHICKEN, i've been wandering aimlessly, numb, trying to make sense of things. So this happened!
> 
> Sorry for any mistakes, English is not my first (or second) language. Enjoy!

There was a knock in his door.

Balthazar pushed the blanket off his head and sat up on the bed. His hair was tousled, his eyes red and puffy from crying.

“Come on in” he said as calmly as he could.

The door opened slowly and Peter’s face appeared. His eyes darted around the room, never looking at Balthazar.

“Hey” he muttered softly.

“Hi” Balth answered.

Peter closed the door behind him and leaned into it. For a second there was silence, then Peter sighed and finally looked at the other boy.

“I think we need to talk.”

“You think?” Balthazar answered sarcastically. “Well, that was fast. It only took you a year.”

Silence settled between then. The tension in the room escalated as time passed without a word between them. Finally, Balth cracked.

“You don’t want to say anything? Fine. Then I will.” He breathed in once. Then he started to gesticulate. “You know how I feel about you. You’ve known it for ages. I’ve made a fool of myself in front of you, trying to get you to notice me. This last year it’s been an emotional rollercoaster, and I’m starting to feel dizzy. So please, just talk to me. Say anything. _Anything_.” The last word was merely a whisper.

Peter looked at him with bright eyes, fear written all over his face. He opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again.

“I…” 

He stopped and looked down. Balthazar waited for a few second, then huffed.

“Still nothing?” He smiled bitterly. “You want me to remind you what we need to talk about, perhaps? Let’s see. I’ll start from the beginning. From Pedro.” He pushed his sweater paws to cover his hands and held the blanket to himself. “The all-around great guy, friend of his friends, student leader.” His eyes glazed, unfocused, set in the past. “Pedro was perfect. He was handsome, confident, funny, witty... He was all I ever wanted to be. He was already my best friend, it didn't take me long to realize I was falling for him.

“But then... Pedro made a mistake. He hurt someone. How could he hurt someone as nice and genuine as Hero? We all realized (and with all, I mean Pedro too) that he wasn't as perfect as we thought him to be. He then apologized for his mistake, and Hero forgave him, so did I, and eventually everyone else did too. But not himself. He never forgave himself for that.

“So, he had come down to earth, with us mere mortals. We were equals. _Finally_ , I thought maybe something could happen between us.

“He asked me outside. Beatrice stopped us and talked to him instead. I'm not mad about that” he clarified abruptly. “She was the last to forgive him. He needed that. But the he stayed late to help Ben with the video, and he promised he'd come to my gig the next day. I figured we'd talk then and sort things out, but then the time arrive and..." 

"He wasn't there" muttered Peter.

"He wasn't there" repeated Balthazar. "And I promised myself that was it. I wasn't going to be thrown around by him any longer. I was going to get over him no matter the cost.

“I started dating other people. We rebuilt our friendship and never talked about that almost. We moved to Wellington together, to prove to myself that I could have him as a friend and nothing more. 

“The feelings never did go away, but I was really good at hiding them. I thought if I ignored them long enough, they would eventually disappear.

“Things were good until they weren't. Just when I thought I had moved on, he left. Pedro disappeared, Peter came in his place. I mourned his loss internally, but I thought that with him being a whole now person my feelings would not be there.

“I was wrong. Peter was different to Pedro, but that does not mean worse. He was still handsome, still funny, a little bit more troubled... Confident too, in a different way. Confident like someone who owned his flaws. So what I felt for you stayed. 

"It became a vicious circle" admitted Balth, looking at his hands. "You'd bring someone home, I'd try to forget about you and almost succeed. Then you'd look at me, or smile at me, show me you cared and I'd be hooked again. Then my hopes would get crushed to the ground, and we'd start all over again. To this day."

Peter sat next to him in the bed with a sigh. They stayed silent, looking at their hands, not quite touching, until Balthazar heard a sob to his right. He watched as Peter leaned down and put his head in his hands.

“God, I’m a mess” said Peter. _How can I have screwed up so badly?_ “I never wanted to hurt you.”

“You did.”

“I’m sorry.” He got up again, taking Balthazar’s hand. “I… I don’t deserve you, Balth. I keep hurting you, and I can’t seem to stop. I’m not the best person to be in a relationship with. You deserve so much, and I can’t give it to you.”

Balthazar sighed, obviously annoyed at Peter’s mantra. He squeezes his hand to make him look up.

“I get that you’re still trying to redeem yourself for last year, I do. But you don’t need to. We’ve all moved on. You’re the only one who keeps thinking about it.” Balth put his hand in Peter’s face, softly caressing his cheek. “It’s time to let go.”

Peter smiled sadly, looking at Blath through his welled-up eyes.

“I really like you, you know? I should have told you months ago.” Peter confessed. Then he added, “What if I fuck up? I don’t want to destroy a friendship for a _maybe_.”

“What if it works?” He countered. “Or doesn’t? At least we tried. We can’t go back now, Peter. Not after everything we’ve said. I don’t want to go back to the pinning, and the longing glances. That was not a friendship. That was a prelude.”

Peter looked into Balthazar’s eyes, trying to find an ounce of uncertainty, but he found none. Balthazar’s big blue eyes, his light smile, his big sweater covered hands. They were all right there, waiting for him to decide.

He leaned into him slowly, giving him the chance to back down, but Balthazar stayed put. Soon their lips met in the sweetest kiss Peter had ever tasted. There was something unique and magical about finally doing what you’d been thinking about for months. Their mouths moved against one another. Balth’s hands caressed his neck and hair, sending chills through Peter’s body. He hold on to Balthazar’s hip, pulling him close.

They parted with a smack and Peter rested his forehead against the other boy’s. He opened his eyes and looked at him. Balthazar wore a tiny smile that created small wrinkles next to his closed eyes. Peter had never seen him more serene, and him being Balth, that was saying something.

Balth stepped back and laces his fingers through Peter’s. He got up, pulling Peter’s arm.

“We should go see what our flat mates are up to.”

“They've gone get pizza” Peter told him, walking out of Balthazar’s room.  


“Do you…” Balth started, blushing, “…tell them about this?” He raised their interlocked hands.  


Peter thought about it. He pictured Ben and Freddie’s smug faces and answered:  


“Maybe in a few days. They deserve it for being meddling bastards.”  


Balth smiled. He stepped closer to Peter, looking at his lips, and Peter did the same. They stayed inches apart, breathing into each other’s mouths, not touching. After a few minutes, Peter leaned in and pecked his lips.  


“Ha!” Balthazar yelled, throwing his arms to the air. He headed to the kitchen. “I won!”  


Peter chuckled and mumbled, “I think I did.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Tumblr: [findanotherreasontosmile](http://findanotherreasontosmile.tumblr.com/)


End file.
